Ten Percent

Even since I was a young kid with a paper route, I was taught and I believed that tithing was a requirement. As a Christian, we were supposed to give ten percent of our gross earnings to our local church. I complied with this rule completely, from my pre-teens until I was 29 years old.

I understood that tithing was intended for general offerings only and it couldn't be designated to anything specific. The church leaders were supposed to figure out the best way to invest my money, not me. The only thing I worried about was whether I should tithe additionally on any cash gifts that I received. I usually made up for that little bit of doubt by donating an extra bit to some secondary cause at church.

At the beginning of every year, I made sure that I got a box of tithing envelopes from my church. At the end of the year I would donate my unused envelopes back to the church so that they could be placed in the back of the pews for anyone that ended them. I would also black out the registration number so that there was no confusion for the accountants. In fact, I was often the one that replenished the envelopes behind the pews when I noticed that they were missing.

Naturally, I always got a receipt from church for my charitable donations, which accounted for a fairly large tax return every year. I had a friend that believed that getting a tax return on tithing was somehow against the principle of tithing because you weren't giving your full amount. I said that this was just smart practice but if they were really worried then they could tithe on the income tax return, too. Actually, I think I started doing this after that discussion.

I was aware of the different verses about tithing, both Old and New Testament. I had heard enough sermons about the blessings of tithing and the curses of selfishly keeping our money. The main verse about tithing from Malachi was usually printed on the tithing envelopes, anyway, so it was pretty obvious.

I knew that the majority of people at church did not tithe. I saw enough church budgets at the annual meetings to know that less than 20% of the church members bothered to tithe regularly. I also knew that because the pastors told me so during a sermon here or there. However, I would never force anyone to tithe. If people said that they really couldn't afford it, I chalked that up as poor budgeting or a personal decision. No biggie, everyone has issues that they have to work through, including me, and we don't need to get all legalistic about it. Let the pastor preach, let the Holy Spirit do his thing, and people will figure it out.

Now take a breath, Jamie...
I don't believe in the requirement of tithing anymore. I don't believe in the general principle behind it. I will go even further than that and say that I believe that tithing is quite wrong. Wrong to do, and wrong to teach. And for my part in this, I am sorry.

I mean, did you see what I wrote up there? I never realized how legalistic it all was. So many little rules and exceptions. It sounds so hard to keep to keep track of it all!

I recognize that part of it was my natural tendancy to find rules and obey them. I'm a goody-two-shoes that automatically does that kind of thing. Even so, tithing has always been a part of my Christian life, and it's been a big part of the churches I attended.

It took me about a year and a half to walk away from tithing. At first, I vaguely questioned the practice. I learned a little more as time went on about the Biblical basis for the current idea of tithing, versus the way tithing was done back in the Old Testament days. My first big step as to stop tithing all of my money to my local church, and give money directly to friends that needed it. After that, I decided to save that ten percent and keep it as my personal giving fund. Then I decided to pull back from the idea of setting any kind of restriction on it and I let that set-in-stone ten percent go. Finally, I had to admit to myself that it wasn't just a nice idea - it was actually the wrong thing to do.

Emotionally, it was hard to let go and I felt quilty for doing it. I still feel a little guilty, kind of. I was walking away from church teaching, and walking away from what my parents taught me. Breaking a habit is always hard to do.

Intellectually, I had to discard the Biblical interpretation and the arguments I had heard for so long. I could have handled that but once I got rid of the idea of tithing, a lot of other ideas fell apart as well. The whole idea of how a church pays it's bills and how pastors get paid became a mess for me, since I was always told that churches survived based on tithes. Like a house of cards, pulling out that one Ace called "tithing" caused a bunch of other cards to fall down.

And so here I am, writing about my journey through the issue of tithing. I intended to write about the Biblical references that we use to support tithing, but I ended up writing a more cathartic assessment of myself instead. I will follow up this post with Part II to get into some of the specifics about tithing...

Religion Ain't What It Used To Be (Part III)

I'm a Christian but that ain't what it used to be. My beliefs have changed quite a bit in the past two or three years...

(See Part I for the introduction and then Part II.)

Evolution

Yeah, I was persuaded some time ago that evolution actually works, as I wrote here. Considering the amount of time I devoted to research and debates on this topic, this was a big change for me. I was finally convinced by an author that explained the science behind it while still being open to Christian spirituality. I like to think that I'm willing to honestly consider opposing opinions regardless of the source or cimcumstances, but this author really communicated to me through simple respect.

I still think that God actually created everything, so I don't buy into the Big Bang theory directly. However, I may be willing to accept that the earth wasn't created conveniantly six thousand years ago, as calculated from Biblical geneaologies. Which leads me to my next point...

Accuracy of the Bible

And here's where I go right off the rails! I've heard so many arguments that the Bible contradicts itself, and so many arguments about the Bible being historically or scientifically inaccurate. I've heard 'em, analyzed 'em and argued against 'em. Naturally, I said, the Bible is perfect in every way.

And yet, here I am. I'll state this clearly: I no longer believe that the modern NIV version of the Bible is the infallible, perfectly accurate Word of God.

I think the Bible is incredibly reliable in umpteen different ways. I think it's the most well-kept ancient document of any kind. I think that it is a very clear picture of the reality and truth of the Christian God, and a great picture of Jesus' time on earth.

I also acknowledge that the people that wrote it were human and may have messed up some details. There may have been some copy problems along the way, or problems with word-of-mouth history before things were written down, or simple problems with the memory of the people testifying. Then there's the history of how the books of the KJV translation were selected, versus the different book selections from Catholic or Orthodox denomiations - so is the KJV selection perfect?

To go a step beyond that, there may be significant problems with all of the English translations, period. Besides normal difficulties with basic English interpretation, some of our English versions may in fact be translations-from-translations. Apparently, recent research by Nehemia Gordon shows that the book of Matthew may have been written in Hebrew originally, but our English version is based on various Greek versions. This scholar has this two-hour video that goes over the main arguments for this idea. Some of the common Bible verses that we have memorized may in fact say the opposite in the original Hebrew - and this video absolutely blew my mind with that revelation.

I love the Bible but its hardly written in stone, so to speak. Yep, I'm a crazy now...

Conclusion

So I'm a Christian but that ain't what it used to be. I still visit church once in a while but I'm not nearly as involved as I used to be. I still think that local churches provide various advantages that can't be found anywhere else, but I wonder if those advantages are worth the disadvantages. And since I am fully against the idea of tithing now, that pretty much leaves me at odds with any number of Christian denominations.

I did find that I had to back away from church in order to see it in a different light. I couldn't really understand how people could feel so rejected by church until I was on the outside looking in. And now that I'm on the outside, I have discovered that I'm part of a very disorganized and very large group of people that have similarly walked away from church. I don't know what will become of this happy unchurched population of Christians but it seems like a scary and freeing experience so far.

It's taken me a few years to make this transition and I assume I'm not done yet. We'll see where we go from here...

Religion Ain't What It Used To Be (Part II)

I'm a Christian but that ain't what it used to be. My beliefs have changed quite a bit in the past two or three years...

(See Part I for the introduction, and Part III is here. There's a lot of ground to cover here, so I'll open up the different topics and then we can follow up with more detailed discussions if anyone wants to do that...)

Tithing

This is the central piece, the ace that toppled my house of cards. I've been faithfully tithing 10% of my gross earnings since I had a paper route as a ten year old boy, giving that money directly to my local church. I often gave even more money on top of that, usually towards specific ministries at church.

I came to realize that (a) tithing is not a Biblical requirement for Christians and (b) the brand of tithing that we commonly teach at church has very little to do with the original tithing laws in the Old Testament anyway. (For example, poor people aren't supposed to tithe.) After years of habit, and years of collecting receipts for my charitable donations, it actually took me more than a year to fully quit tithing.

Church Income

Once we take tithing out of the equation, this directly effects how a local church runs. The church has utility bills and staff salaries and supplies to pay for. Granted, some churches (a minority?) do not promote tithing and may not even collect money during every service, but even these churches depend on regular donations in order to keep running.

We seem to have three options:

1. Give money to the local church because it's mandatory (a la tithing).
2. Give money to the local church voluntarily - but it's actually mandatory because otherwise, the church will have to close due to bankruptcy.
3. Do not give money to the local church - in which case there can be no local church.

The common result, regardless of a church's stance on tithing, is to have 10 to 20% of the church members give money on a mandatory basis. This supports the majority of the other members who do not give or give little.

I no longer believe that tithing is valid. I see voluntary giving as either being "secretly" mandatory or a hypocritically mandatory responsibility for a core group of members, and I don't buy into either of those ideas now. Therefore, I am left with Option 3 - the dissolution of local church? That's crazy talk!

Church Expenses

For arguments sake, though, let's say that the church continues to get enough money from purely voluntary donations, on a continual basis, and everyone is happy. Then, we need to look at where the church expenses go.

The majority of a church budget goes to two spots: paying for the building (rent/mortgage/utilities) and paying for staff salaries (pastor/youth pastor/custodians). When I donate money to church, the majority of it actually pays for my own experience at the church. The equipment for the musicians, the time it took the pastor to prepare and preach, the child care programs, the actual facilities that I visit.

I like to think that my money supports the poor, or some sort of spiritual outreach like a missionary, but only a tiny percentage (2 to 5%) actually gets there. Instead, I have to accept the view that the church building and the staff are the main forms of spiritual ministry. And while local churches do fulfill certain needs that would not be met otherwise, I no longer see this as necessary or efficient.

Instead, the very best spiritual growth that I have ever received or helped has come within the context of close friendships. And the combined money of this same small group of people can dramatically change the life of another person more easily then a church corporation can. In terms of the plain Return On Investment (ROI), I don't see local church as a good bet.

Paid Pastors

The real focal point of the church is the big guy (or sometimes girl) that stands up front every Sunday to teach us all a little somethin' somethin'. To a lesser extent, the focal point of the church also belongs to the youth pastor or children's pastor of the counseling pastor, since they do the face-to-face stuff with people.

Of course, gettin' paid falls apart unless money is still comin' in. And since I don't buy into the tithing or mandatory giving model anymore, the money isn't there and this position can't exist anymore.

I also have more philosophical/theological grounds that leads me to think that we should not have paid pastoral jobs anymore. For one thing, I now think that Jesus and the New Testament exemplify *not* to do this. I think that each Christian is more than capable of fulfilling a pastor's duties one-on-one or two-on-two with friends. Beyond that, I think that the existence of the pastoral role stifles the involvement of the church members themselves - despite the fact that pastors frequently preach against this type of thing. The church subtly enforces a corporate approach to care giving and relationships, with a hierarchal model and leadership, rather than natural group life.

Church Family

So that leads to the cliche that the local church should be a spiritual family. I have moved between cities a number of times while growing up, and I always realized that churches come and go and we rarely have any contact with former church friends once we depart. These are usually friendships of conveniance - we see these people every week so it's easy to chat and maybe make plans to hang out. Once the conveniance factor is gone, so is that friendship. That's not a big deal because this is true in almost all walks to life. Friendships with co-workers, or even with immediate family members, tends to dissolve if someone moves away. That's normal, but it's a far cry from the concept of "church family."

Note that I use the term "friendship" loosely here since most church friends remain at a somewhat superficial level. Actual discussions about real-life difficulties or our hopes and dreams are not a part of this. It takes a conscious effort to develop a deeper friendship, and church is not designed for that purpose.

The dark side of this is that it's easy for people to leave a local church without anyone talking to them afterwards. Even worse, it's easy to ostracize a person from the local church. People are formally and informally kicked out of leadership or out of church for all kinds of reasons. Don't agree with tithing? Strike one. Don't attend the Sunday service? Strike two. Cause too much discussion about what the church teaches? Strike three - you're out of here!

And once you're on the outside, it's tough to retain those former friends. I've heard way too many stories that attest to this dark side, but it's tough to see when we're still part of the church. Love your neighbour, it ain't. Kinda appreciate your fellow church member, it is.

... Coming in Part III, I talk about the controversial topics. ;)

Religion Ain't What It Used To Be

I'm a Christian but that ain't what it used to be. My beliefs have changed quite a bit in the past two or three years...

*cue time travel montage*

I've been a Christian since I was a wee young 'un. I have vague memories of praying beside my bed by myself as a 4 or 5 year old boy, asking Jesus to forgive my sins and come into my heart. Easy as that. It was a natural part of life growing up in a Christian family. (To be specific, within the Pentecostal denomination of Protestant Christianity.)

I went to Braeside Christian camp as a kid every summer with my family, and I regularly went to Silver Birches Christian camp as a teenager. These camps usually involved group activities and games, and some sort of elongated church service in the morning and evening. It was at Braeside camp that I experienced baptism of the Holy Spirit, complete with evidence of tongues. Later on at Silver Birches, I experienced the phenomenon of laughing uncontrollably in the spirit. Somewhere along the way before I was a teenager, I also chose to get baptized in water when we attended a church in Vineland, ON.

My parents were always heavily involved in church ministry, usually focused on children and youth. Later on, around the time I was ten years old, my dad decided to ditch his plush job with GM and go to Bible College to become a full-time pastor. That allowed me to graduate from goody-two-shoes church boy to good-two-shoes PK (Pastor's Kid) but weekly life didn't change too much.

Every year from the time I was born until I was 29 years old, I regularly spent 2-3 days each week at church. In the early years, I was attending various childrens' programs or simply waiting for hours while my parents chatted with friends after church. During my teens, I was always involved in various youth group events. By my twenties, my parents and siblings were scattered across the globe while I become even more heavily involved with music ministry, cell groups and leading youth groups.

I've been involved in church as a vocalist since I was a young teenager, singing either bass or tenor. I sang backup vocals for Sunday services and I've been a member of various choirs - even recording CDs at two churches. I also took over as worship leader in both home and church settings, handling everything from pre-planning to the cues for the band. Eventually, I added some rudimentary piano skills so that I could both play and sing in smaller groups. I also became fairly proficient as a percussionist, playing instruments like congas, bongos, shakers and tambourines.

I wasn't shy about my spiritual faith or my status as a Christian. I frequently debated with people in person or online about any number of God-related topics. I taught both adults and youth in over a dozen different settings. I published various articles in the local newspaper and the school newspaper.

In short, I wasn't just a guy that accepted what I was taught. No, I was the guy that was doing the teaching. I simply didn't submit to the particular version of Christianity that my parents believed, I was the one that promoted it.

I'm born and bred this way. And as an adult and on my own two feet, I chose to continue on this path. I became even more ingrained in it, if anything. I've always been very certain of my faith, and very certain of my particular brand of theology.

*fade from montage to present day*

When I hit the ripe old age of 29, various factors conspired to show me different parts of Christianity in a new light. Little by little, different pieces of my theology came into question and fell apart. It was like a game of jenga, taking one stick out and then another stick out, until the whole thing came toppling down.

Well, not the whole thing. I still believe in God and I still consider myself a devout Christian. It's just that I have modified or entirely scrapped different parts of my spiritual beliefs.

I know other people that have had similar experiences, and some of those people opted to dismiss the whole story. God and Jesus, the devil, heaven and hell, spirituality, souls, the Bible... If a person won't accept some parts of it, then why accept any of it?

As one example, there's a fascinating video series on YouTube by a guy that was a Christian just like me. He explains how he gradually lost his faith, bit by bit. "Deconversion," he called it. Common to other stories I've heard, a big part of this process came through his post-secondary university experience.

Some of this guy's discarded beliefs would have struck me as silly even as a kid. Even so, his video series is visually and mentally stimulating. Here you go...
Deconversion: Why I am no longer a Christian
(Note: As recommended to me by Nathan Hatton. )

To sum up, I still look back very fondly on my years in church. I just don't buy into much of what Christian religion is selling these days. More to the point, I don't buy what *I* was selling. In my next post, I'll try to summarize how my ideas have changed over the past two or three years...

Update: Part II is here and Part III is here.

Top Ten Movies of 2009

This is my sixth annual Top Ten list. As before, this list only accounts for movies that were officially released in 2009, and I saw 55 new releases in all this year. I only considered the movies that I actually saw but there are still 61 movies on my future wish list...

[10] Where the Wild Things Are (Link)
This movie made my list because of everything that it didn't do. It didn't use the usual 3-act movie arc; it didn't explain who the characters were; it didn't have a tidy ending; it didn't let you off easy in any way. The director obviously had a very specific idea in mind for this movie, and much of the credit must go to him. I just read the original children's book a few weeks before seeing this and it's quite brief but I think that the soul of the book was left intact. This movie makes you feel the emotions of growing up and the hurts of a modern family, but it does this in entirely unexpected ways. And if you can have some extra Fraggle-like monsters running around, then all the better!

[9] The Blind Side (Link)
This is the standard based-on-a-true-sports-story movie but it has the advantage of being based on a current NFL player. Rather than glory in past achievements, we can flick on the next Baltimore Ravens game (Jan. 10!) and see him in action, and visit a sports website to see his profile. That aside, the movie's quite enjoyable. The central characters are played by Sandra Bullock and Quiton Aaron and they nailed those roles. The downside is that it's tough to know which scenes were Hollywoodized for the sake of drama but I assume that osme of the gang-related scenes weren't exactly like that in real life. Also, the husband's role is strictly yes-man to Bullock's dominating wife, which got annoying after a while and apparently isn't very accurate. Minor critiques aside, it was a good sports flick that worked really well as a date movie.

[8] Surrogates (Link)
I can't help it: My list is heavy with sci-fi flicks. I love reading sci-fi novels and short stories and, if anything, I love watching sci-fi flicks even more. While this movie was sure to include the standard action scenes and finale, it was the technology and social commentary that made this better than the average movie. They didn't just set up the basics of people using remote-controlled robotic avatars. They gave a completely believable "this could really happen" intro for the movie and then played with numerous examples of the effect this would have on people's lives. By comparison, the movie Gamer also had some similar sci-fi concepts but did very little with those ideas. This is a definite Bruce Willis type of movie and it didn't get much box office but if you haven't seen it then by all means, check this out sometime.

[7] Watchmen (Link)
As a serious comics geek, I was paying attention to all of the early hype for this movie. I've owned the original graphics novel since forever and it certainly was a genre-changing book back in the 80's. The movie, however, hardly has that impact. It's a great comic movie but nowhere near the level of The Dark Knight or Spider-Man. I marveled at how accurately the movie portrayed exact scenes from the comic book and I thought the twist ending was an actual improvement over the original plot. Even so, the dramatic heart was kind of missing. The actions scenes were brutal but it was the other scenes that seemed to be missing je-ne-sais-quois. The best part of this experience was external to the movie, actually. My wife decided to read the entire graphic novel, every single word of it, beforehand. I skipped a lot of the boring stuff between chapters but she was able to understand both the book and the movie on a deeper level that I did and I admired her muchly for that. Now, I'm just waiting to see the final super-extended Director's Cut version that incorporates the animated movie between movie chapters. Geeks of the world unite!

[6] The Hurt Locker (Link)
This is the thinking man's action movie. Much credit to the director, Kathryn Bigelow, for putting together this indie flick. Even though this is was critically acclaimed it was woefully underappreciated while in theatres. It's about a bomb-squad guy with serious skills, and it explores his crazy attitude and why he does what he does. Set in middle of the ongoing Iraqi war and it plays real and gritty. To quote the best line in the movie, "The rush of battle is often a potent and lethal addiction, for war is a drug."

[5] Sherlock Holmes (Link)
I have always been a fan of the original Sherlock Holmes stories but I haven't seen many movies based on these flicks - possible because there were no recent ones. I'm aware that there were critics originally dismissing this because it was too much of an action flick and it disregarded the original stories, and the fact that the movie makers claimed that this was even more accurate than previous movies. I will agree with both sides of that argument, actually. This movie is more accurate than previous incarnations but it still takes certain liberties. Holmes was a kick-ass strong guy when he had to be and he did have difficulty keeping his intricate mind busy when he didn't have a case, and his sidekick was more than just a portly author. Even so, the books depict him as more controlled than the movie version. Despite the fact that I'm such a fan of the source material, and I give kudos to the director Guy Ritchie for modernizing thigns in just the right ways, I can't move this up any more. It's a good movie that I thoroughly enjoyed and I hope/assume there are sequels to come but I would have enjoyed this movie just as much at home as I did in the theatre. The reason I recommend this so highly is the way the central characters were written, and how they were portrayed by both Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law. And it wasn't an "origins" story, either, so it gets bonus points for that.

[4] The Hangover (Link)
This was easily the most hilarious movie of the year for me. I wasn't sure what to expect but it just kept piling on the crazy until you couldn't help but laugh. I'm a fan of Bradley Cooper because of his role in the Alias TV show and the cast was a great band of misfit misfits.

[3] District 9 (Link)
Lo and behold, my Top 3 movies are sci-fi. I loved this little-movie-that-could. On a low budget but with the reputation of Peter Jackson behind it as producer, this was a completely unexpected surprise. The alien effects were superb and the action was bug-nuts but it was the intentional parallel to South African apartheid that really made me appreciate this movie. On the flip side, my wife thought this was a terrible movie. ;)

[2] Star Trek (Link)
This movie is emminently re-watchable. And I say that because I have watched it quite a number of times in the past year. The cleverness of the time travel = parallel universe plot allows this to pay homage to the original TV show and movies while moving in a new direction. The cast was perfectly chosen, the effects were great and it had sooo many memorable scenes. Kirk as a boy, Spock as a boy, Kirk in the bar, the introduction of Bones, Spock and Scotty, Spock enraged... I could go on and on. Kudos to the brain of J.J. Abrams for pulling this quasi-reboot out of his hat.

[1] Avatar (Link)
This film absolutely must be seen in the theatre in 3D. This is the kind of film experience that has to be big and bold. Do not wait for this to show up on DVD or Blue-Ray because it won't do the film justice. James Cameron creates a new world out of nothing, with its own rules and unique beauty, and we can't help but become completely immersed in this creation. It is a straight-ahead sci-fi movie with with a romance at the heart of it. Even if you don't want to buy into the omni-present CGI and the funky aliens, you can't help but be drawn into the story and the planet. Box office records aside, this is the one movie that everyone needs to go out and see in the theatres.

Honourable Mentions:
Up (It has those magic Pixar qualities and it made me cry.)
Zombieland (Three words: Bill Murray cameo.)
Moon (A one-man drama in which Sam Rockwell slowly goes crazy - or does he?)
Taken (Actually released in Europe in 2008, it's way better than expected.)
The Brothers Bloom (I'm always a sucker for a good con-artist movie.)

Top Movies on Wish List:
Monsters Vs. Aliens (Top 10 box office, somehow I missed it.)
Up in the Air, The Men Who Stare at Goats, Fantastic Mr. Fox (All George Clooney movies, all well reviewed.)
Inglourious Basterds (Tarantino and alternate-history WWII are enough for me.)
Cold Souls (Little known, weird & funny sci-fi with Giammatti chewing up scenery.)

My Previous Top 10 Lists:
2004, 2005, 2006, 2007 & 2008

References:
Film Release Dates for 2009
Top Grossing Movies of 2009