Bought the Farm

My family is moving into our new home on Saturday August 21, 2004. We start packing the U-Haul between 8:00 and and 8:30 am. We plan to be done the bulk of it by 1:00 pm because the U-Haul needs to be back by 2:00 pm. We would certainly appreciate the help of anyone who cares to join us. In particular, we have limited number of able-bodied guys so strong young men would be appreciated. We're supplying pizza afterwards to fulfill the cliche. Don't ya just love cheap labour?

My thanks to anyone that would have liked to have helped but will be busy or away that day.

My brother and I have a new phone number that will be activated on Saturday as well. Our new phone number is (519) ???-???? but it's not guaranteed until it's actually turned on. Don't worry about forgetting it, our old phone number will have a message for the next month directing the caller to our new number.

Good for Evil

In this post, I wrote that God never wants us to repay evil for evil. That's Jesus was talking about in Matthew 5:22: "But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca,' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell."

This passage is talking about returning evil for evil. It's about responding to another person in anger for what they have done without ensuring that our own motives are pure. It's about calling someone a name in return for something that they did to you. As I said in my previous post, we are all responsible for our actions regardless of the other person and regardless of the circumstances. Jesus is saying that we are accountable.

Still, checking our own motives and not repaying evil of evil is only the first part of the equation. Once we're sure that we have dealt with our own hearts, there's still the problem that evil was done to us. So how can we respond in a Godly way? Here are a few ideas of my own, but feel free to add more suggestions.

1) Return good for evil. This, I think, is God's primary response. He gave us Jesus in return for our sin. Romans 12:17-21 instructs us to not repay evil for evil. It then continues with a quote from Proverbs and says that we should feed our enemy if they are hungry or give them a drink if they are thirsty.

2) Deal with issue by speaking to the person directly as soon as possible. Matthew 5:21-24 tells us not to respond in anger. It then continues and instructs us to reconcile with the other person quickly, even if it means stopping what it is that we're currently doing.

3) That passage from Romans also tells us to "leave room" for God's judgement. God is the final judge. That means that we should not take matters into our own hands and seek revenge or our own brand of justice.

I've written for long enough, so maybe a few other people can add some other ideas and related comments. There are several more Godly ways to deal with someone that hurt us but I think I like the good for evil one best - it's so fun to do. I'll just add one final note: After all of this, the other person may not have done evil to you in the first place. If we seek too eagerly for justice, we may find that we are only ones standing in the mud in the end.

Evil for Evil

"Do not repay anyone evil for evil." Romans 12:17

Call someone a name because of something they did. Refuse to do a person a favour because of something they did. Gossip about a person. Grumble against a person. Enlicit sympathy from someone because of something someone else did. Refuse to do your chores because the other person didn't do theirs. Refuse to complete your part of a school assignment because the other person didn't do theirs. Take away something you gave to a person because of something they did. Break someone's trust in you because they broke your trust in them.

Don't do it. No matter what the reason, God will not allow you to return evil for evil. I've been there, done that. It's not easy to break a lifetime of habit. Yet no matter what the cause, if you return evil for an injustice of some kind than that is your sin.

People do hurt other people and that does need to be dealt with, but it has to be dealt with in a Godly way. None of the above examples are Godly ways. My next question will be, how do we deal with injustice in a Godly way? That is only the second of the two issues. You first have to deal with your own actions and then you can look at how to deal with the other person. If you have not examined and received God's help in cleansing your own heart, then anything you do or seek after that may not be in love - and everything should be done in love.

Prefer Others

Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. Phillipians 2:3-4 (The Message)

"Who's looking out for #1?" "If I don't take care of myself, who will?" "I only want what is rightfully mine." "Hey, I just don't want to be the one that gets used." "What have they ever done for me? Why should I be nice to them?"

"Prefer others." That's another way that this passage has been phrased. If you want Option A and the other person wants Option B, which option will you usually choose? Ah, but this isn't like one of Joel's questions. It's not about which option is more important. I say that you should find Option C, the compromise that works well for both of you. You do not need to become the other person's Yes Man (or Woman), but neither do you need to hold onto your own preferences so tightly.

Too often I find that people will hold on to Option A for all of the good reasons that they can think of. What does it cost you to be kinder than that? (For some it costs more than they would like. For others, it seems to cost little - even though it may be the exact same situation.) I say that there's still room for personal growth if we do not intentionally choose to put others first, whether that's within some ministry at church or it's by offering the first slice of pizza to a family member at home. I say that to be like Christ

To put it more succinctly, if you do not choose kindess towards others as your primary response then you choose selfishness. Don't be trapped by this bond of your own making.