Assume the Blurst
It's funny how people assume the worst so often. If someone doesn't reply to an e-mail within a few days, we're worried that we did something to offend them. If people do not respond to an invitation to a party, we wonder why nobody wants to hang out with us. If someone is late to an event, we wonder if they care about the other people involved.
In my experience, I find it's more useful to assume the best intentions of my friends and acquaintances. If someone doesn't reply to an e-mail, their e-mail program may have blocked it or they may be out of town. If people do not reply to an invitation to a party, perhaps they did not get the message. If someone is late, perhaps they got stuck in traffic.
In fact, I encountered each of the above situations this past week. And yes, the other people did indeed have only good motivations and circumstances simply got in the way. I find that my life is much less stressful if I assume that my friends do not want to hurt me or ignore me but that they do care about me. People are often surprised when I offer them their excuse for missing out on something before they can even say it. I'm not a mind reader. I just know you're my friend, that's all.
I look at my cup as half full in most situations. I do know some people that are constantly pessimistic and assume their cup is half empty but it seems to me that this approach is rather exhausting and very often incorrect. (For example, T. White. No, wait, that's too obvious. I mean, Tara W.) Our friends do care about us and they aren't out to get us. Sure, genuine problems may arise but we can cross those bridges when we come to them. We don't have to dig trenches just to make a bridge to cross, inventing problems everytime something a little unexpected happens.
"It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times!?! Stupid monkey!"
4 comments:
This sounds a lot like my personal mantra of giving people the benefit of the doubt. The only difference is that my motivation is to not judge people negatively and yours is to, even more simply, know that they are your friend. I like it. Thumbs up! L
So out of a thousand monkeys at typewriters, how many do you think see their glass half full?
Since I'm optimistic, I would hope that the majority of monkeys were optimistic as well. There's some circular reasoning for you.
Seriously, though, I think that a majority of people will more often take offense at the actions of others, rather than assume good motives. The social skills we learned in grade skill have a sneaky way of kicking around. (She said what about me? He called me a what?)
Jagrant, you are the worst person I have ever met and your higene is substandard. Try to assume something good for this responce fatty!
Post a Comment