Lessons of Discipleship (Part I)

As I mentioned at the end of this post, there were a few key lessons that I have learned since I started seriously looking to disciple others at the age of twenty one. Discipleship entails a lot more, of course, but there are a few things that stick out in my mind.

Lesson #1: Few People Want a Mentor
This was my first lesson. When I created my cell group, some people jumped at the chance and others did not accept. I didn't assume that I would mentor everyone but I wanted to provide opportunities for others to have a mentor or to be a mentor. Discipleship can seem tricky because someone is the mentor in the relationship and someone else is under that. It does involve some authority and submission issues.

I think that a lot of people here in London, and in North America in general, find that tough to swallow. Who is this person to say that they are more mature than me? Who are they to say that they have something to teach me? It's viewed as an issue of pride or control rather than a means for personal growth.

Interestingly enough, I'm told that the biggest church in the world is in Seoul, South Korea. The reason that the church can be so big is that it's based on cell groups. One person leads a small group and the members in turn start their own groups, while remaining under the leadership of their original group. It allows for exponential growth while maintaining close relationships and supervision.

Apparently the cultural differences between North America and South Korea are fairly significant in this respect. In South Korea, it's habit to think that the group is smarter and/or more important than any one individual. In North America, it seems that autonomy and personal freedom are more important than the group consensus. I have certainly seen this "group think" in action with the Korea kids that we have had staying with us.

So to take that cultural divide and apply it to my former cell group, that might help explain why people here don't take to discipleship and mentoring naturally.

In addition to that, my dad likes to point out that people often continue to follow whatever principles they first learned. If someone became a Christian through street evangelism, they're more likely to do street evangelism themselves. If someone was brought to Christ through Alpha, they're more likely to use Alpha to reach others. If they grew up in a cell group, they're more likely to continue with cell groups later on. Alternatively, if they have never experienced evangelism, Alpha or cell groups then it can be tough to encourage a whole new approach.

Beyond those two explanations, I am sure that there are dozens more. Some are good reasons, some are just rationalizations and some are downright bad reasons. In the end, though, it's up to each person to either accept or decline the chance to have or to be a mentor. I came to learn that all I can do is offer the opportunity and then we move on from there.